How To Become A Serial Dater

Getting fit together

2010-08-04T09:44:00.000-07:00

Ok, so bootcamp sounds so militaristic, but that is what we are doing. We are leopardcrawling through the dust, doing situps in the dust... running in the dust - with tyres above our heads.

I think my new husband is regretting saying yes to a whole month of torture!

4 months?

2010-07-24T00:59:00.000-07:00

Where has the time gone to? I distinctly remember being on the beach just a few weeks ago. I don't get it.

I can't wait for winter to get lost. I miss the sunshine, hot mornings and super hot afternoons. I definitely miss the pool and seeing the sun shine by 6am.

My Leprechaun had to rescue us from the bedroom the other day. For some odd reason the door didn't want to open (and it was unlocked). I almost panicked - but... my Leprechaun whipped out a small toolbox and voila... we were free.

Honeymoon in 2 months. Europe here we come!

2010-07-12T07:46:00.000-07:00

Hello there! Well, I made it. I survived week 1 of a new job – after feeling very lonely and without lunch partners... I suspect that starting at a new company is more stressful than moving house. I literally thought I was going to keel over from a coronary – that is how stressed I was.

Making the decision to actually resign from my old job was hard. I looked at it from every angle, but in the end I had to make a move to work closer to home and climb the ladder a little. I finally decided that being a graphic designer for another year would kill me.

When I sent my CV out I talked to my Leprechaun and we discussed all the pros and cons of a career move. In the end… the lure of working 3 days at the office won and kazaam!

We are going on honeymoon in a few months (yay) so excited about our travel arrangements! Want to show my husband the world.

Would you download podcasts

2010-06-21T10:15:00.000-07:00

with my rantings on? Give me a yay or nay!

So who has who wrapped around their pinkies?

2010-06-21T10:01:00.000-07:00

I know the cat has me wrapped around his little kitty toe - but exactly how much do the humans get away with in this relationship?

So, we have 2 evil humans sometimes ganging up on a helpless kitty (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qpHI_0bjDM) and sometimes it is me and Mr Genie against the Leprechaun. Mostly it is me and Kitty bitching at the Leprechaun.

On the other hand, we have a Leprechaun that gets away with way too much. He never has to explain why he comes home late after work. He doesn't always have to cook (and I distinctly remember him promising he would do that forever and ever). Kitty and I let him sleep on the bed...

Mr Genie on the other hand always gets away with everything. He just has to miaaw and mommy is there. He never gets a hiding - even though I know he is an evil little child.

I guess we all have a little bit of everyone wrapped around their pinkies - which really makes it nice :)

Comfort Zones

2010-06-14T05:55:00.000-07:00

Human nature dictates that we settle into patterns. These patterns become a way of life for us and we like the comfort of being able to know what to expect - but what does it really mean.

Slipping into a comfortable pattern life means one thing only, you have stagnated in your life/relationships and you are basically in a rut.

Stepping out of our little comfort zones seems daunting and therefore we mostly prefer staying put.

I'm one of those people that loves the comfort of what my patterns bring. I appreciate knowing what to expect, but sometimes the daily patterns really irritate me.

I get up at 5am, get to work by 6 and work till 2, then go home and grab lunch before leaving for fitness activities by 4 and get home by 6, watch TV for the rest of the night and start the whole process over again. It sucks.

I've decided to do 1 thing a month that I would never have done before - should you not do the same?

The truth about life

2010-06-03T04:56:00.000-07:00

... if you don't live it - you are wasting oxygen.

So anyway, after all the woohaaa has died down of the weddings and being pestered for wedding photos winter already has its icy clutches firmly embedded.

We are homebound... literally, we go to work, get back home and switch on the big gas heater. We eat dinner under blankets and go to bed early. Maybe it is just the house, maybe it is our age, but we definitely aren't living life 100%.

I definitely can't wait for summer!

In the meanwhile the FIFA Soccer World Cup is starting in the ext few days and the Bulls just won the Super 14.

I think I should do a post about stepping out of your comfort zone....

Different strokes for different folks

2010-06-03T04:38:00.000-07:00

Surprise... I didn't forget about sharing some of my thoughts on the book!

Some people merrily go through life 'agnostically', others need a religion to hold onto and some just need to find themselves to find a spirit that will empower them. Meditation may for for you, but running around naked in nature for others.

It doesn't really matter in the end what helps you to get balanced (mentally) in your life - it only matters that you get there.

Unfortunately not everyone can afford the luxury to go away from home for months (or weeks) and stay at an ashram (or holiday resort, or...) but, you can always make a plan to take a break somewhere (even if its only for a weekend).

Comfort food (still eating through Eat Pray Love)

2010-05-24T01:18:00.000-07:00

So, Elizabeth in Italy eating pasta, pizza and everything else.

Some of us are comfort eaters. Food brings comfort. Then we get fat and a downward spiral begins. Some of us get to lose the fat easily and well, others not.

Bad habit - nip it in the bud (if only it was that easy). Food only brings temporary comfort, but the lasting effects on your body may be far worse than the original issue that drove you into the arms of comfort food.

Eat (... Pray... Love)

2010-05-07T22:30:00.000-07:00

Discussing a bit of Elizabeth Gilbert's book Eat Pray Love - because it is a really great book to read if you need to do a divert in your life.

The first part of the book sees Elizabeth landing in Rome, Italy, where she proceeds to travel, eat and learn Italian.

Traveling is a great way of changing your outlook on life. It eases the process of changing your perspective and takes you away from your murky life. It gives you the chance to breathe fresh ideas and be away from what blocks your growth.

Thats it... go read the book!

The Aftermath

2010-05-03T03:13:00.000-07:00

It has been so quiet in our lives since getting back from our Moz (photo op) wedding. It has been 5 or 6 weeks and we have seen 1 set of friends. It could be that the freakishly cold weather have just taken away everybody’s will to go out or it could be that people think something has changed in our lives and we want to spend all our time alone. It is rather peculiar.

We have finally gotten all the photos everyone took – and there are quite a few stunning ones. Now it is to apply some Photoshop magic to it and distributing it to all the interested parties.
Since the phenomenon above has occurred, we have spent many hours on the Wii – literally. If it isn’t Wii Fitness then it is New Mario or Lego Indiana.

Mr Genie has now moved his preferred nap base to the top floor of the penthouse. He is a rather odd creature – it could be that in his tenth year he is evolving into a creature of luxury and new habits.

Next topic… What I learnt from Eat, Pray, Love... because Elizabeth wrote a really awesome book.

Week 3 of Married Life

2010-04-05T01:24:00.000-07:00

Now that everything has settled down i can finally relax during the Easter holidays. The family left for Ireland and there are no more scheduled braais and restaurants to visit, no more plans to make or people to phone to remind that they have to be at a specific place to do something, no more bachelors or loading pics onto Facebook. There literally is just the next lifetime to look forward to.

On a nice long weekend like this we like to do very little. We didn't visit with anyone - we went to the movies and watched movies at home. The husband worked (as he owns his own business) a little.

We are taking the teamwork thing to heart nowadays too - we wash clothes, hang it, pack the dishwasher religiously, torture the cat with lots of love and love having a series watching marathon.

You know what I love most about being in a committed relationship? That it is so much easier. Things just seem to fall into place and no nagging required (yet).

When man was created...

2010-03-30T23:16:00.000-07:00

the best piece was taken to make a woman.

Since getting back to work I have gotten a gourmet sandwich, water, snack and yogurt packed by my new hubby. The lunch thing may not last that long, but I love it!

A great idea on spending time together would be to spend some time together to spice up your lunchbox and take turns in making them (while you supervise).

The wedding

2010-03-30T07:03:00.000-07:00

What can I say - my wedding was perfect. We had fun (in the sun). He looked gorgeous in his white shirt and the guests looked a bit sunburned.

Going on a getaway with family and friends can be hard - for someone like me that jealously guard my free time. I loved seeing my loved ones, but all I wanted to do was be on the beach with the brand new hubby.

How old is old enough to get married?

2010-03-30T05:00:00.000-07:00

In my opinion, 18 really is too early to think of marriage, maybe 22 is old enough, maybe not. You haven't done anything yet but go to school @ 18. You haven't gone to university or college, nor have you really grown into the person you will be for the rest of your life. Besides... marry young, get kids young @ 18... it just sounds like kids trying to play house with little dolls.

Don't get me wrong, there might be 1 in 50 million that can actually do the get married before your ears dried thing successfully, but... it takes work, patience, experience and a whole lot of other things.

My advice to parents and big sisters and brothers that see their siblings go down this road blindly - send them to this blog. :)

So, I've now been a Mrs for 2 weeks now. Long time if you ask me. I'm back all tanned and brown from our beach wedding in Mozambique. Loved it, had some really beautiful pics taken and my family and friends LOVED my wedding - no stuffy speeches or getting dressed in anything fancy.

The ugly truth about dating and relationships

2010-03-11T02:51:00.000-08:00

Getting to the stage where you and your new squeeze are finally exclusive (or dating steadily) has its obstacles. The very first being to find a suitable candidate, then having to vie for his/her attention, fighting off the other interested parties, keeping the attention focused and making time to get alone time.

This morning on my way to work one of the local radio stations had a call-in about: "do you trust your partner?". The callers that I heard were women and they seemed to think that it is acceptable to have that nagging feeling that he is up to no good the whole time while he is out of sight. Which is really sad.

Now at the stage of your relationship where the shine of it all has somewhat worn off and you actually do go out without your squeeze - there is always the possibility that some new toy will catch your squeeze's eye. You could now run screaming to a private investigator and frantically trying to access his email and sms messages - or you could stay calm and not become a paranoid freak that will anyway drive your squeeze away.

In the event of your squeeze doing the unacceptable - you will have to make the choice (a) cut them loose (b) scare the living crap out of him/her. If the problem persists (after choosing b) - get that damn third party in a public place with a loud confrontation. Everybody would like to know the scarlet letter wearing, cheap gigolo/whore that cannot keep their knickers on when in the company of decent people.

Long distance relationships

2010-03-07T08:02:00.000-08:00

The hardest relationship to maintain is a long distance relationship - I know, I tried it once.

Scenario:
Guy dates girl in home country; Visits every 3 months; Telephonic contact weekly; Email contact daily; Girl has admirers and an ex boyfriend that regularly phones;

How to handle the situation:
a) Give her space and don't start a fight about it and
b) you may be seen as not caring enough
c) Or put it out there and
d) push her right back into the ex's waiting arms

Dating Advice?

2010-03-07T08:01:00.001-08:00

Anyone have any objections if I convert this blog into a dating advice site (since I no longer date and almost being a married woman)?

Setting up house together

2009-12-16T11:35:00.000-08:00

It is official, we have bought a house together and moved in. We are now co-owners of a beautiful penthouse in the suburbs.

We still have some unsorted boxes, but I am hoping to get to them between Christmas and New Year.

We are getting married in less than 3 months... and I can't wait for my week on the beach for the wedding. It is going to be awesome! Think beach, beach, beach.... aaah....

So anyway, happy merriness and all that jazz.

3 lazy bums in bed

2009-09-19T12:15:00.000-07:00

Today the 3 of us (The Genie, The Leprechaun and me) only got out of bed at 11am. I think it is an all-time record for us.

We usually get out of house by 10pm (take into account that we get up an hour before leaving)... anyway... no more late night movie watching :)

Will a relationship last across a cultural divide?

2009-09-14T10:53:00.000-07:00

This is a pretty tough question to answer especially since my busted relationships were always with people from the same (sorta) cultural backgrounds as me.

I guess it all depends on what is important to you and just how much you are willing to compromise.

In my current relationship:

He is English (obviously, being a Leprechaun and all)
but he understands my language

He is allergic to cats
but after 2 years he has conversations (just like me) with the cat

I really never liked spending too much time with parentals
but I like his and don't mind seeing them (besides... I like Leprechauns)

I really hate cooking
but I cook for him - sometimes

We make decisions together
but also have things we do apart

What is important in a relationship and how do you know if it will work for you?

Can you see yourself becoming part of a team?
Does he/she take your interests/likes/dislikes into consideration before planning something?
Do you like his/her skew nose/mouth or teeth - or can you stand that weird laugh?
Do you feel special after the newness wore off?

I can't believe I fell in love with a Leprechaun

2009-09-14T10:48:00.000-07:00

... words straight from the uber romantic movie, PS. I love you.

I really can't believe that I just happened to find my own Leprechaun on African soil and just happened to fall in love with him. Yep. I'm damn lucky.

I've heard it so many times that obviously I will be doing a post about the question - "Does marriages/relationships across cultural borders work?"... but that is in my next post :)

6 months people - then I get married and become Mrs Deysel-Leprechaun. Pretty cool.

Coo-eeee

2009-08-06T11:32:00.000-07:00

I know, I have been dead quiet for a whole month and a bit – but this time I have a really good excuse. I went to boot camp for a whole month after work. I ran my legs into serious knee injuries and ran further still until the last night when I finally killed a quad muscle too.

It has been a week and I’m still at the chiro and doing my hot pack/cold pack routine. I miss boot camp.

What is new in the life of the Leprechaun and Suzy? Well, the Leprechaun and I are getting married in 6.5 months on the beach. We have signed some nice papers and may have some great news soon. We’ve also decided to get rid of a lot of stuff so I will still sort through my stuff.

I’m also noticing that Mr Genie is really starting to get old. I’m suspecting he is losing his sense of smell. My kitty better not get old on me...

The men in my life

2009-07-12T23:00:00.000-07:00

Last night something really hilarious happened, but let me give a little background information...

My extra large kitten sleeps on the bed. He takes more than a quarter of the bed – leaving me with a quarter.

Last night the Leprechaun put the kitten in his kitty Igloo and boing... out is kitty. He jumped straight onto my chest and first stood there for a good scratch. I think the Kitty tattle-taled on Mr Leprechaun for throwing him off the bed!

Dating questions answered

2009-06-19T00:25:00.000-07:00

So many questions, so little time! I love getting questions... so keep ‘em coming!

Where did you meet your fiance? Was it related to the internet dating or like so many comments I read you need to meet someone in your social circle? Does internet dating work?

We used to work together about 5 years ago – but back then I ignored him as he was a real player and I really wasn’t about to become a number. Then one sunny day (almost 2 years ago) he contacted me via Facebook and we went on our first date (ever) – it took him about 2 weeks to ask me out though. The rest, well, is history.

Social circle... what if there are no eligible guys in your social circle. In my case the guys were either (a) short (b) was dating my friends (c) bored me to tears. Then there is also the little problem of if you date someone in your social circle and you have a nasty break-up... then you most probably will bump into him/her more often than someone from outside your friends’ group.

Did dating a whole lot of people make you good at dating and being more sociable? Maybe give you the confidence to put yourself out there?

I don’t think you’ll ever think of dating as recreational again after going on so many dates, but it also has its upsides. You get to meet people and learn to pick up on things that you dislike faster (saving the both of you a lot of time). It also helps you to become a great conversationalist that can get a "dating interview" started.

It never is easy to just put yourself out there – it never was easy for me, that is why I chose to go the online dating route. Apparently I never noticed when guys flirted with me in person (at clubs, bars, etc) either – I guess they felt rejected and decided to not walk up to me to actually talk to me!

Did you ever remain friends with some of the guys on the dating web sites or was it pretty much 'let just be friends = dont call me again' - i.e. Can you use internet dating to meet friends?

I definitely met quite a few great guys while being an online dater. Some I really didn’t have anything in common with others were great friend material. I still chat to 2 or 3 of them – never really see them anymore as they are hitched now. I do however still get great tips from them about awesome restaurants!

In the end it doesn’t really matter where you meet your next (or last) boyfriend/girlfriend. The only thing that matters is that you meet the one that makes you happy.

Spending time together

2009-06-18T22:30:00.000-07:00

After almost 2 years of dating the Leprechaun and I are still having fun. We have just had a long weekend and decided to stay at home with my beloved Mr MooKow.

Our first day off, get DSTV on again – after 6 months they might have new programmes one. I watch TSN and Zone Reality... and my Leprechaun... Hallmark, Action and Series.

Day two – there was a day two? I think we washed clothes and stayed in watching DSTV. Lame, I know.

Day three – awesome, we went shopping and had lunch with his mom.

Day four – put up the new clothes line and discover the new blind from Makro has no strings. Very disappointed and iffed off about that blind – returning it this weekend.

Mr MooKow (the cat) enjoyed having his minions around.

PS. Will answer the questions on Friends & Neighbours blogpost on my next post!

Friends and Neighbours

2009-06-01T00:12:00.000-07:00

Winter definitely has arrived in all its force. It is dark by 5:30 in the afternoon and the wind has a chill that makes me reach for a jacket.

We have had quite a few hectic weeks at home with my family visiting and we are solidly booked for the next 2 weeks as well. I really don't understand the need to be social during winter. I can think of nothing better than to sit in front of the gas heater with a balnket and my favoutite Jelliebean - while the Leprechaun makes dinner.

We're good friends with our neighbours right next door and for the last 2 years we have shared break-ups, new boyfriends, tragedies and lots of coffee. Last week was definitely one of the saddest days as my neighbour's cat was killed by a speedster in the complex we live in. So, after taking the body for cremation at my vet, we were pretty upset and decided to all just have dinner together - for the first time with the new boyfriend.

So anyway, that is the small talk done. Now for some pearls of wisdom!

I can definitely see that opposites attract (sometimes). The guys are so different with Neighbour being the party animal of note and New Guy being so laid back. It just shows you that even if you dated bad boys in the past, it never is too late to let the good guys win.

Cold winter nights

2009-05-24T12:11:00.000-07:00

It really amazes me that winter just pitched up and decided it is time for cold dark mornings and early sunsets...

Lucky for me, the Leprechaun and I have a TV in the bedroom and can cuddle comfortably - and snugly - while watching a DVD.

We've also been talking about our honeymoon a bit. Pretty cool stuff we're planning. :)

What my Leprechaun did for Mommy's Day

2009-05-11T00:35:00.000-07:00

Men are known to be great big ogres. They don't remember birthdays, anniversaries or pretty much anything other than food.

This weekend the little Leprechaun phoned his 'Mommas', bought her a potted indoor plant, a card and invited them to the movies to see Dirty Dancing on the big screen. Just to top it off he made a potjie (stew on a outdoor fire or gas cooker) for 6 - and it was delicious.

I must admit that I'm the one that can't remember anniversaries. I can remember birthdays - and I buy great gifts most of the time.

Things people say

2009-05-01T12:47:00.000-07:00

Today I took my visiting sister, bro-in-law and child shopping. During the day the conversation turned to my bathroom... yeah I know... pretty weird.

So anyway, the kid said that she needed to go to the bathroom and then my evil side somehow kicked in... I said to her that I didn't like people using my toilet. She then asked where the Leprechaun goes (haha... ). The very smart answer: He has to go outside and dig a little hole and as soon as he is done he has to cover it - just like my cat!

The day goes by and I didn't think about it again until a few hours later when she asked with big eyes where she should go! (haha...) We then explained that I was only joking and that she can use the toilet.

An hour later the Leprechaun used the toilet and she came running to tell me that he was in there! Imagine the good laugh I had about my private toilet that I don't share with my live-in FIANCE.

Who's the man?

2009-04-26T09:26:00.000-07:00

The Leprechaun is!

I love April with all its public holidays. All the looooong weekends have given us time to do some DIY projects. Today we bought the wood to build an additional cupboard. The Leprechaun has put it together and I have stain varnished it to fit with the rest of my furniture, unfortunately we need another tin and a bit of varnish to complete it... SIGH. I can't wait to put all my sexy little shoes on the bottom shelf. I think it is going to be great.

I really appreciate that my little Leprechaun can do DIY stuff... and know what he is doing. Ja, ja, I can hear you... so can't you do it Suzy? Of course I can, afterall, he used my tools. Tools that I know how to use, but here goes the pearl of wisdom...

Girls, take note... Let the man in the house swing the tools. I don't know why, but it makes them feel manly.

Can beggars be choosers?

2009-04-18T14:08:00.000-07:00

Yes! Definitely!

Why do people think that when you are single you can't choose to wait until you've met the right person? I don't think there is anything wrong with being 30 and not married. A piece of paper won't really make such a big difference in your life - unless it is a ticket to some exotic destination.

Who wants to be in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship anyway? A warm body in bed that you don't care for = a can of rotten peas, but a warm body that you care for = someone to share that last rolo with!

Another reason to rather be a chooser... the high rate of divorces.

Anyway, so I got a comment on my previous post... and the person thinks I'm single. Ok, so the cat has been out of the bag for... um oh well, more than a year - I'm engaged. Have been for more than a year now... to my Leprechaun.

Don't Date Down

2009-04-07T11:04:00.000-07:00

Yeah, you know what I mean... dating down is a no-no.

Simple Scenario:

X dates Y
X is not rich, but smart as hell
Y is rich, but dumb as hell

X is thus the one dating down. Y is dating up (which is completely acceptable).
Anyone can make or loose money, thus Y is actually no better/richer than X.

So, get your priorities straight and look for someone that is on your intelligence level. If a social level is more important... then get someone on your level.

All work no play relationships

2009-03-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

One or both married to the job? No good...

You have to have balance in a relationship. Some play, some work and good quality time together.

See, after 30 the pearls of wisdom just spill from my keyboard.

The Getaway

2009-03-27T07:38:00.000-07:00

It really is great to be in a relationship with someone like my Leprechaun. Not only doesn't he nag (like some men do) when I want to shop a little; nor does he complain too much that I wake at 6am and by 7am wake him to get ready for the beach; and spends the whole day on the beach; and have the little romantic streak to take me for those tedious beach strolls (I know, it is not easy walking on beach sand)...

So anyway, my pearl of wisdom for the day (now that I am 30...)

Dating someone that does not share your interests will make it a little harder to spend quality time together. You may be so different that between work and hobbies you only get to spend an hour a day together before going to bed.

I'm in the mood to dish out some wisdom...

2009-03-19T12:09:00.000-07:00

I've been reading the Adv. Barbie/Cezanne case on and off in the newspapers. On the one hand I feel sorry for her, on the other I think that what she did was just despicable.

The Summary:

This chick got involved with an older man. He is a bit twisted and manipulative - so he took over playing god with this chick. They got caught doing some nasty stuff and he skipped the country leaving her to face the music.

The Lessons: (you know how much I love my lessons)

If you date a pervert and play along, you will eventually get caught - you'll go to jail and be somebody's bitch.
If you are in an abusive relationship, you can get out. Dial a number, get out, stay out.
You don't need to sink as low as the person you are dating.
If you want to sing for the world, make sure you can actually sing.
Date someone you respect AND that respects you.

10-4 oor en uit/over I'll be back older and full of lessons and wisdom when I turn 30.

Happy Birthday to ME

2009-03-19T12:06:00.000-07:00

... and then there was 2 days left of being in my 20s!

Interestingly enough my life is not more interesting than it was 2 seconds ago. I'm still watching movies and working a whole lot.

I better get good presents this year. Else I will change my will and leave everyone a zap.

When can I start feeling young again?

2009-03-11T23:31:00.000-07:00

30. It really is a big number.

I can still remember my 21st birthday. Standing in the kitchen making all the snacks with my then boyfriend. My best friend arriving late and cleaning out the plates - while talking more than everybody put together.

On my 25th I got horribly drunk on red wine with one of my dearest friends. The poor guy even offered to help me puke (really disgusting, isn't it?). The next day I had a hell of a hangover.

My 28th was fabulous. 5 girls on holiday in Ballito. The night out... the drinks were cheap and I got a lot of free drinks. I was really drunk - at least I had no hangover the next morning.

Why is it that when you turn 30 (or older) it really is just a depressing affair? Don't bs me and tell me I should have a big party because it will make it all better. BS. It won't turn back time, therefore I really don't need to hear "aaah the big 3 0..." wow.

Anyway, if you are still young enough to think birthdays are fun, sod off and go stand in a corner. You make me sick. Speak to me when you turn 30.

How to survive a break-up

2009-03-10T07:45:00.000-07:00

Life throws us many curves, sometimes more than we think we can cope with.

I've been through a lot of break-ups / make-ups and final demises of relationships. Some were particularly hard to get over - others not so much.

Get Stuff

You don't have to go all out to get all new stuff, but changing bedding for a room or changing the colour scheme of 1 area will already be a step in the right direction. As soon as you start erasing the lousy ex's existence from your home, you take away the hold he has and memories of him. (This speeds up the recovering time after a break-up.)

Get a really sexy number to wear out. It doesn't have to be super reavealing or tight, just something that makes you feel like a million bucks.

Connect with Friends

Even if you neglected your friend while you were in a relationship with someone, they will take you back. Friends are forgiving - and besides, everyone understands.

Meet new people. Get your ass out of the house and stop pondering about the what ifs and could have beens. You need to get out and live a life that you never even dreamt about. Join a book club or something.

Get a Hobby

Are you one of those hobbyless people? Then get a hobby. It doesn't have to have sticking power - it just has to be enjoyable for now.

Delete that number

There is a reason it didn't work out. Doesn't matter if it were you or him/her that ended the relationship. Save the number under asshole or idiot if you have to. (It works for me...)

Get Pretty

Go for that facial or day at the spa (invite a friend). You will feel much better for a few hours.

Try a new colour lipstick or shoes - or dress.

Conclusion

You were whole before and you will be whole one day again. Besides he/she never deserved someone like you in the first place.

When you get older... different things matter more than the low-life idiot you dated.

Catch and Release

2009-03-09T07:49:00.000-07:00

I watched Catch & Release this weekend. A real tear jerker - but with a good lesson (or 2).

Summary:

The groom drives off for his bachelor's weekend and dies. His funeral then takes place on their wedding day. The bride-to-be/widow
then finds herself in the midst of lots of drama ie. Mom-in-law asks for the family heirloom on her finger and a possible child that her departed beloved supported.

Facts:

Women tend to rely on their boyfriends/fiances/husbands too much and then something happens and they suddenly have to get up and take control.
Women tend to trust too easily and are always the last to know about affairs.
Some women too easily let their bf/fiances take the lead in the relationship - when this ends the woman is left to drown in normal life.

The Lessons:

If you live with a guy (and depend on his share of the rent etc) then you need to have a signed contract/agreement.
Never just trust your partner blindly, but don't be completely psycho about his getaway weekends.
Get your will done if you intend on getting married but put a clause in that says this part only kicks in when you are married etc. (In the event of you procrastinating with your will in future.)
Make sure you can afford to maintain a lifestyle and home even if it is just for a few months after a break-up/death - just until you can get a new roommate or move to something cheaper.

As always, keep on dating and have fun!

The little PINK comforts of life

2009-02-28T07:59:00.000-08:00

How do I put it without sounding too insane. I still love pink, the brighter and louder - the better.

Today we went shopping for bedding and I walked out with chocolate and pink pillows for the living room... a creamy fitted sheet and pillows in my favourite pink. I know most men would feel intimidated by so much pink, but my little Leprechaun can handle it :)

This week was kind of rough. Lots of work and things going on right now. From people's birthdays to my mom visiting.

I definitely need to grab a holiday away from home (poor Mr Genie). Definitely somewhere by the coast, no tv, no internet, no nothing. I can dream, can't I?

Kitten love

2009-02-17T11:12:00.000-08:00

Mr Genie has been a big part of my life for the past 9.something years and last weekend he got into a little cat fight. My Leprechaun was the first to be downstairs... even though I was the first to get under 2 cars to fish my unhappy kitty out.

Since Saturday, I'm proud to say, Mr Genie is now again my personal bodyguard. When I wake up, he is on the bed. When I get home, he is on my parking space.

... I just have to train the Leprechaun to cook during the week :)

Emergency money for dates

2009-02-11T07:15:00.000-08:00

Today I realised why I always keep money in my cellphone pouch...

I first started putting a note into my cell's pouch way back when I first started clubbing. This continued when I started seriously dating... and it stuck.

Why keep money aside

I call it my emergency money. I may part with my handbag involuntarily, but my cellphone... aikona. Plus, what if you needed to catch a taxi or phone a friend after a bad date where you lost your handbag...

Bridezilla

2009-02-05T07:59:00.000-08:00

Dating was a breeze compared to organizing a wedding. Suppliers are slow and load prices... I'm just about ready to jump in my car and drive 1 000km to get stuff sorted.

How insane can weddings drive brides to be?

2009-01-28T21:20:00.000-08:00

... in my case, pretty insane!

On the best of days I already am not a very understanding type of person - but when it comes to the wedding... I can say it is 90% about the bride and 10% about the groom (unless of course he wants to organize it!).

Anyway, for guys that currently has a Bridezilla, hang in there. You were crazy enough to propose, deal with it.

BTW, I found some articles on www.goddess.co.za about weddings etc.

Romantic Getaways

2009-01-23T06:05:00.000-08:00

I think it is necessary to go away together - on little weekend getaways... by the beach, make that on the beach.

I found this dreamy looking holiday spot on www.Stay-SouthAfrica.co.za - it looks really yummy. The deck... then the ocean. If only I had the leave!

I dream of being quiet little waves and blue blue waters... in Mozambique!

Well, back to earth, a getaway for 2 that won't break the bank. I looked on www.Stay-SouthAfrica.co.za and there were quite a few options of budget accommodation available... with the wedding and all, we gotta sometimes for less.

Being the Constant Gard'ner

2009-01-12T07:33:00.000-08:00

Nurturing a relationship is like having to play the gardner. Too much or too little of anything can kill it. Gardening is hard work, a lot of guess work and even more natural coaxing and love of the "plant"

If you are one of those people that really can't stick it out and just about ready to quit the dating scene, why not try your hand at growing a plant from a tiny little seed? If you are able to do this, you most definitely are a caring person that just needed a bit of patience - and a break from dating!

I am a bad Suzy

2009-01-09T03:25:00.000-08:00

This week I just don't feel like anything. I don't want to get up and I don't want to get out. I just wan to stay at home with the black cat torturing me.

I'm toning up with the Wii Fit :) Happy about that.

Not much else I have to write about... hopefully next week will be better.

Looking for another pea for your pod?

2009-01-05T07:29:00.000-08:00

After some really weird conversations these last few weeks, I have come to the conclusion that some of my guy friends are insane.

They complain when they are single but would find the smallest fault with the women that they are interested in / getting involved with. The worst part, I sometimes think that some of the guys should rather get a doll - she would be perfect. Won't complain, won't nag, would be almost on the same intellectual level...

Then this weekend I went out with one of my oldest girlfriends in Pretoria. We had a fabulous time out at some club. Obviously my dancing queen days are only a distant memory, but we had a ball on the dance floor.

We later joined 3 guys at their table, 1 married, 1 heartbroken and the other from the UK. It was a fun night where we had company but didn't want to get into our panties - imho, a bonus.

Afterwards we went home and talked about the good old days where we still worried about going to a club like that and worried about picking up men. Those were the (not so good) old days!

Who is the worst?

2008-12-29T11:04:00.000-08:00

The man or the cat with his particular ways? Sometimes I wonder...

I love that he is Irish (born in the country of the little people) but can't hold his liquor! I love it even more that I'm browner than him (even though I have a fair skin). I love it even more that his shoulders are wider than mine... on a bad day :)

I love that my cat likes him. (Not that the cat thinks he isn't the ruler.) I love that the cat lets him take care of him and bites him just as hard as he bites me.

Well, anyway, happy 2009 and all that is good!

Until after Xmas then

2008-12-22T11:49:00.000-08:00

Enjoy Christmas with your loved ones, whet ever you are in Africa or the states!

I will be back online just after Xmas.

Dating advice

2008-12-16T23:13:00.000-08:00

I have cousins that are quite a bit younger than I am and sometimes on Facebook I see their statuses coming through on my "what happened wall" and I feel sorry for them.

The one in particular seems to be in that break-up / get-back-together type relationship. If only she knew the golden rule... if it broke, there was a reason for it, it wasn't working 100%.

My honest opinion, she will date lots of guys after this one. She will have her heart broken many times and break even more hearts herself.

If only the young ones knew... don't get so serious so damn fast. You still have a lot to learn / see / do before settling down.

Apparently I can't hold my liquor!

2008-12-12T05:32:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I had 1.5 glasses of wine. By glass I mean, the tall medium type... and I passed out.

I'm guessing it was to do with the heat becuase it is a "low alcohol" wine - supposedly.

My poor kitten thought something was wrong and woke me with his little miaaws. Poor thing. The Leprechaun thought it was hilarious...

If I utter only nonsense...

2008-12-11T02:12:00.000-08:00

would you still come back to read?

Well, I officially feel the December slump. I have nothing to say. Life is good, the Leprechaun and cat well.

Wish it was 2009.

Christmas away

2008-12-02T21:38:00.000-08:00

Well, it really is that time of year again... when it doesn't snow and the sun tries to burn you to death. It is also a time to spend with family - and unfortunately not with my Leprechaun.

How do you decide which parents gets you for Christmas? I go to mine because it is one of the few times I can go for more than a weekend and the Leprechauns spent their Christmas together.

Lessons of Life

2008-11-20T23:09:00.000-08:00

One of the earliest lessons I learnt was from some guy that was madly in love with my sister (and that she was not even interested in).

We were all out with my parents on a 4x4 excursion and this guy tagged along. My sister completely ignored him and I felt sorry for him. We chatted quite a bit.

Then at the end of the day before he went home heartbroken he uttered one of the most profound lessons.

He said something like, "you are perfect, perfect personality, beautiful and I wish I had feelings for you". It might sound a bit harsh, but the jist is that no matter how perfect you are, sometimes you just aren't the one.

Men in Ties TM

2008-11-20T07:17:00.000-08:00

Ever wondered why men put on ties even though (we know)they don't like it? Really, how comfortable can it be to walk around with a noose around your neck?

At the last year-end function I had a good chuckle at the men tugging at their ties. A hour into the night most ties were off anyway. So what is the point of wearing it?

That time of year

2008-11-14T01:23:00.001-08:00

I love this time of year. I love putting up the christmas tree and most importantly, wrapping gifts... notice how I didn't say "buying gifts".

This year my family already got their presents when I landed back in South Africa - I asked... so, would you like your Christmas gift now or Christmas... obviously all opted for the GET NOW option. (It would've killed me anyway if I had to keep it stashed!)

I had to buy my sister's two banshees gifts, but that was fun. Now I still have to give gifts to the Leprechaun family - not so easy...

Who else hates going shopping during the busy season? I must admit that usually I buy gifts in October already - just so i don't have to spent time in the malls. Not only are the crowds horrendous, there is also the possibility of being robbed or shot... and I refer to Joburg mall being robbed.

Back and ready to write

2008-11-13T00:27:00.000-08:00

My holiday was really awesome. I loved Europe - and missed my Leprechaun (just an itty-bitty).

I phoned him from Amsterdam and spent more than 40 minutes with my 10 euro phonecard chatting to Leprechaun. You can read all about my travels on Travelstart's blog!

Now that I'm all tanned and toned from walking almost 20km every day in Europe, I miss exercising. Since good old SA is not that safe, I invested in a little Wii to keep in shape. I have already had 1 injury while playing tennis!

Now that I'm back it is also time to start planning our wedding... sigh - I see my time and relaxed mood fading already! I'm definitely feeling the chocolate, cream and screaming pink theme for this event!

Every relationship | adds something new to your life

2008-08-22T02:36:00.000-07:00

In my opinion, every relationship has some good. It might not be the biggest part or the part that you will remember after the relationship ends, but still ... you might have found something that is you in this relationship.

In a new relationship you (usually) get exposed to new things - things that were there, but never entered your little world. It might be something as simple as a dish or a band.

A guy that I dated in one of my very first relationships in Johannesburg, opened a new world of music to me. I used to listen only to pop and rock - but never heavy rock. To this day, I love listening to Linkin Park.

Another thing that has stayed with me was a line in a letter that a guy gave to me. It went something along the lines of: He wishes that he could enjoy life the way I do. Yes, it may come from a time that I didn't have a mortage and car to pay, but sometimes, just sometimes, I still see those words and I wonder, why am I not just jumping and doing the things that I want - then of course I convince myself and do it.

With my fiance I learnt that curries aren't bad and that his cheesecake "fetish" sometimes is a bad thing :) oh, and that not all Leprechauns wear bells on their shoes.

Weekends away

2008-08-03T12:44:00.000-07:00

Sometimes a break from our daily routine really is great.

Not only did we get to step out of our home shoes and get to spend time cooped up in a car and then spending a night or two somewhere... but when we got home, I think we really appreciated each other even more.

I must admit that I have become a real home body these last few months. Staying at home wasn't always this high on my list of things I love to do, but... since EU is coming closer... the more time I can spend with my man and son (The Genie), the better :)

WHat is your fav breakaway activity?

East London to Home

2008-07-23T11:01:00.000-07:00

It was lovely in East London. The weather was great and the ocean was fantastic. Plus I made a few really interesting acquaintances - hoping these people will become friends.

I had the most awesome time - even though I was there for work. The last night of course (I had an 8pm flight out) I had farewell drinks with the awesome people from the company I consulted at. At least the alcohol calmed my nerves for the small SAX flight I had.

The best part of landing in Jozi, seeing my little Leprechaun and Mr Mookie. Sigh - I love home.

Apparently Mr Mookie was glued to the Leprechaun - so I'm hoping they can do it again in 42 days for another 30 days :)

Cuddle Bugs and cold weekends

2008-07-14T01:43:00.000-07:00

This morning I really felt like sleeping in and after the Leprechaun left for work - and that's just what I did. I then got woken by a small wet nose against my cheek. The Genie came to check on me and make sure that I haven't missed the alarm or feel sick.

This sort of behavior from Genie means one thing, he still loves his mommy - lots. Enough to be a cuddle bug for an hour in my arms... and I never miss the opportunity.

This weekend was really cold. The worst part, it rained. We spent most of the weekend under the duvet with laptops or a movie. Plus, the little bell-wearing Leprechaun made a really good potjie :) Guess what we're having for dinner tonight...
I also made vetkoek - it took awhile to get all the ingredients as I didn't know it needed instant yeast instead of baking powder, but I made it - and it was yum-yum-yum. I even sent some over to the boys next door.

It is only about 7 weeks before I go to Europe for my longest holiday ever and after the bout of flu. I could barely walk up a flight of stairs last week and I need to be able to do at least 20km a day to be able to get to all the sights that I need to see. I now have a rigorous plan to get fit and strengthen the muscles I'll need to lug around my backpack.

The distance that seems impossible

2008-07-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

Right now, I can barely walk 20m without gasping for breath... and coughing. The same goes for the Leprechaun. Food has not really made a comeback into our lives yet as we both now have super smelling and tasting powers.

I need to get well soon and be able to walk at least a few km without being at risk of dying of heart failure :(... I'm leaving in exactly 60 days fro EU.

What changed in 3 days

2008-07-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

Since last I left the house, the petrol price has risen; I'm only 62 days away from Europe; and I'm working on some awesome things.

Things that stayed the same - the cute Leprechaun I'm dating :) and the fact that I'm spending the whole weekend at home! woohoo!

Cough cough... winter got me

2008-07-03T08:39:00.000-07:00

I've been sick in bed for 3 days. I now know every neighbours' working hours, noises and how my house looks in a "permanent state of dusk". I've suffered through the joint pains, coughing, fever and dizziness - and the disgusting meds to get better.

As much as I loved staying at home sleeping almost 18 hours a day for 3 days, I want to get back to work. I miss the chatter and ... my work. I'm so going to work tomorrow as I'm sure I'm not infectious anymore.

Domestic Violence (part 2)

2008-06-25T10:50:00.000-07:00

Domestic violence is not the answer to problems you might have in a relationship. That is a fact.

How do you go on from something like this? Obviously trust has now been lost (and we all know that trust is one of the cornerstones of any good relationship). How will it work if they want to get back together again?

Update:
I spoke to both guys and the one is off to get a knee operation and the other has 2 cracked ribs.

I don't think that a relationship that had something like this happen will work - even if they still care for each other. I love the guys, but things will have to change...

Domestic bliss to domestic violence

2008-06-25T01:46:00.000-07:00

Last night one of our neighbours in the complex had a very violent break-up...

It started out with some loud yelling and my long-time neighbour being locked out of his home. He then went back and the guys seemed to have a chat but then the music got turned up to hide the increasing volume of their voices. My cat was completely petrified each time sometime got knocked around their apartment. The police arrived almost an hour after both of them left - the one left, to pick up his things today, the other taken to one of his friend's as he was injured.

I just hope that my neighbour will be ok and that he won't move out. I'm just really shocked at the intensity of the violence that erupted from the usually quiet neighbours.

2008-06-17T02:08:00.000-07:00

Just when I think I'll take a few weeks off from blogging to concentrate only on work and more work, I get spammed by comments - just joking. I really love receiving your comments, it keeps me entertained!

These last few weeks have been quite hectic with work. I have put in quite a few extra hours to make sure everything gets done on time. I don't mind, sometimes you got to give that little bit more - and besides, the company really treats me well.

On the homefront, my F I A N C E has been absolutely super last week - and he knows why. Its not often that you get a man that stands tall. My cat on the other hand, has decided that sleeping on my man's lap and stretching over his laptop is his most favourite thing to do at night. In the mornings he of course gets out of the CAT CAVE to demand his COOKIES.

My mother was in Jozi this weekend and finally met my f i a n c e's family. We also tentavely put down some ideas for the wedding - so ja, the ball will be rolling while I concentrate on Europe.

In the news last week I read about a company in Tehran that will fire all staff that is not married by a certain time. Now that is just plain stupid. Sounds a bit like a shot gun wedding.

PS. I think (scrap that, know) I've got an online stalker. This person has emailed my fiance and has posted a few nasty comments on my blog that didn't get posted - I moderate. I know who you are, if you don't cease your stupid attempts at being an ass, I will have a restraining order slapped on you.

87 days to Europe

2008-06-09T13:05:00.000-07:00

Don't count on me stopping counting anytime soon. Europe is coming closer and the days just keep on flying by.

Vueling.com has been giving us lots of headaches. My buddy can't book - we tried everyting. We tried both our kt cards, dt cards, booking agents and no cigar.

So if anyone knows what is up with Vueling and Clickair's merger and how to get around this "little: issue - drop me a line!

Nowhere slowly

2008-06-01T06:22:00.001-07:00

Apparently after you hit 150 days, days just fly right past. I'm now on 95 days and can't wait to get my feet on the plane and onto European soil.

My backpack has the essentials. Unfortunately I cannot take Mr Genie or my F I A N C E... but I'm sure they'll appreciate me even more when I get back!

I'm so excited that I can barely stop thinking of all the things I'm going to see.

BTW. I have waited more than 3 years to finally book. I know that you are asking yourself why - right?
Well, we all know that my previous ex was a bit of a non-commiting, non-decisive person ... and that is why this time I've put down my foot (not even hard) and said that I am doing this. So, in your face MR Maybe Sometime Uh I Dunno!

The crazy cat

2008-05-26T23:38:00.000-07:00

I have a cat for those that don't know, apparently he is crazy too and bigger than most house cats.

My fiance is allergic to cats, but Mr Genie (His Royal Highness, The Cat) has won the favor of my fiance with his insane moments.

If, you have never had a cat - like my fiance, then suddenly you have to live with one, you will learn that you always have to feed, scratch, love and get out of the way of the crazy speeding cat.

Last night however, Mr Genie ran around a bit and then it went quiet. Naturally I was worried, because it menas he usually is up to something bad. Apparently he decided that since it is the coldest night of the year yet, he wants to sleep in the kitchen basin.

Yes, I know - it is crazy. I took him to his Cat Cave and a few minutes later... he was right back in the basin! I dragged him back to his cave :)

This morning he woke me at 4am for cookies by scratching the bed and making as much purring sounds close to my head as possible.

You got to love cats for being so damn smart!

The Goddess In You Will Want To Join!

2008-05-13T04:28:00.000-07:00

You loved my dating blog and supported me... we’ll now I invite you to join me on yet another adventure! Go to http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johannesburg-South-Africa/Goddess/21017420026 and become a fan!

1 year dating anniversary

2008-05-07T09:31:00.000-07:00

Our 1 year dating anniversary is coming up in a few months and I was thinking that maybe this time we should do something really different.
I have a balloon ride over Johannesburg in mind – even though I have a fear of heights.

The ride will only be for about 15 minutes and we could have a glass of champagne!

Sleepers

2008-04-30T05:09:00.001-07:00

I really don't know how some people get to fall asleep exactly 7 counts after laying down their heads on a pillow. I really wish I could be like that!

Last night I sat for 3 hours combing Hula Barbie's hair while my fiance snored merrily into dreamland. I first couldn't sleep because it was too early, then because of the snoring, then because I started thinking of Europe...

sigh.

Single? Looking for love?

2008-04-18T13:22:00.000-07:00

Looking for love in the Buffalo area? Then look no further, visit www.BuffaloSingles.com to try online dating.
Sign up for free to this Buffalo dating website, create your profile and browse potential dates in the Buffalo area or anywhere in the world. If you want to contact someone on the website, you will need to purchase a subscription for only $19.95 (valid for 1 month).

If you want access to 2.8 million profiles of eligible Americans or 15.2 singles worldwide, you might want to sign up to these two great online dating websites: www.MatchLink.com or www.WebFriends.com

Looking for dating advice? Visit www.internetdatingtips.info and read relationship expert Lisa James' dating advice and tips.

New blog all about THE WEDDING

2008-04-17T12:31:00.000-07:00

Go on over to my new blog http://beingthebride.blogspot.com to read all about my ideas and planning of the wedding.

Weddings & Children

2008-04-17T12:29:00.000-07:00

I’ve started to plan the wedding. One of the things that I have learnt is that sometimes you have to put your foot down hard and not give an inch. Especially not when it comes to what you want for your wedding day.

I’ve put my foot down on 20 people maximum – including the photographer and pastor. No children, no babies. I will enter into discussions, but I won’t change my mind.

20 people means that a lot of my friends and family won’t get an invitation. I know that this won’t go down too well, but I have set a budget and I intend on sticking to it. Sorry.

The highway flirt

2008-04-09T02:57:00.000-07:00

Last week on my way to work I had quite a good laugh. A young guy was flirting with the girl in the car next to him in peak hour (non-moving) traffic.

He first got her to open her window and listen to the song he was playing for her. Then he tossed a pen and notebook through her car window. She obviously filled it out as it took a few minutes before she threw it back.

It was quite a cute spectacle.

I'm going to be one of those...

2008-03-28T03:27:00.000-07:00

women that show of their rings in the most unnatural ways possible. NOT.

Officially we are now engaged. His parents are psyched to have a "goeie boeremeisie" in their family. My family still needs to warm up to the idea that he is not Afrikaans - at least my Dad loves him!

If you were wonderig, the ring is beautiful. Flawless diamonds. White gold. Perfect.

One other thing. I will not be changing my surname. I quite like it. Besides, I'm too lazy to change passports, ID books, banking details... I just don't do queues all that well either - especially not in South Africa.

Sigh! Ring shopping.

2008-03-19T08:04:00.000-07:00

Today we tried to actually get a ring on my finger. No luck. We had to leave by the second fitting - a unexpected call for my (dare I say it) F I A N C E.

At least I know that eternity rings are the way to go for my slender fingers :)

The secret slowly uncovers itself

2008-03-17T10:59:00.000-07:00

So much for keeping it on the low-down until we have sorted the bling :) The fmilies know and the neighbours know.

Sultry Salsa lessons with the man

2008-03-13T04:15:00.000-07:00

We've recently taken up Salsa lessons with Anthony in Rivonia.

I must admit, I didn't expext to have this much fun! I actually look forward to get all latin with my guy :)

Trying to count

2008-03-07T21:59:00.001-08:00

Recently one of my friends asked me on exactly how many dates I've been. I tried to count, but somewhere along 76 I gave up.

I don't think it is healthy to have to try and remember the past too well!
I do however admit that I don't see anything wrong with going on as many dates as I did - it gave me the opportunity to meet lots of new people and make some new friends.

Another countdown

2008-03-06T01:43:00.000-08:00

I have lots to count down to this year, Europe and the big secret.

Why do I suddenly have secrets? Well, Its not really a secret, more like an untold certainty. I know that most of you have guessed it anyway, but first off to Europe and then the rest of my life can happen. (Sounds a bit crazy - doesn't it?)

This weekend we will have the first mixed friends social at my house. Should be interesting as we have very different types of friends. I'm just I'm thinking, pool, sun, pool noodle and food.

Best Undiscovered Blog - Vote Now!

2008-03-05T02:26:00.000-08:00

You loved the blog? Then please vote for it as the best undiscovered blog!

I have important news - as always

2008-02-25T02:40:00.000-08:00

I'm officially off the dating market - again. This time it may actually be for good.

Now don't jump to any conclusions just yet... just hang in there a little while longer.

Public affection

2008-02-22T12:24:00.001-08:00

I'm all for showing affection in public. The holding hands/kissing thing is ok. What I saw in traffic today... uh-uh!

Stuck on the highway during peak lunch hour traffic a young couple driving a compact Mercedes were kissing for almost 2km. Then the girl flipped back her hair and went down... she only came up 1km away. Time wise it went on for about 20 mins.

Some things you can do in public and others you don't - but who am I to judge?

When you and the neighbours are a part of eachother's lives

2008-02-21T08:01:00.000-08:00

I live in the middle of 2 interesting male neighbours. On the one side I have a recently single 26 year old and on the other a gay couple.

I have seen how my straight neighbour found a girl, got serious and now... go single on his Facebook profile.

My gay neighbours have been dating for about 3 or 4 months. (I must admit that I've probably become closer to them since they have 2 adorable kittens.) They have had their ups and downs, but have worked through it. Today was also a very important day for one of them. The other one is always there - supporting him, even through this.

I sometimes wonder why people can't see how the same gay and lesbian love is. It is a beautiful thing to see people grow so close and support eachother.

Love is... washing the dishes

2008-02-20T11:11:00.000-08:00

... so I don't have to!

What do you do (even if you don't like it) so your loved one don't have to?

Now that Valentine's is dead and buried

2008-02-18T22:53:00.000-08:00

... we can all go on with our lives and forget that it comes again next year.

Well, since 2008 is well under way and we have all forgotten our NY resolutions, we might as well start talking about interesting dating topics - don't you agree?

Single South Africans, get your next partner/boyfriend/girfriend soon - as winter is almost here!
For the rest of the world, if you haven't dated a South African - this is your chance. :) Just kidding.

Seriously, I'm sure quite a few people felt depressed over Valentine's. Especially those that got dumped right before or even on the day. Just keep your chins up and smile. Tomorrow will be better.

{ADVERT - Buy from Kalahari.net}

Yesterday I watched Oprah. She had the author of EAT, PRAY, LOVE. I really enjoyed the discussion and think I should get the book as it doesn't sound like one of those run of the mill type books.

If you want to read more about this book, Eat, Pray, Love - by Elizabeth Gilbert, then visit her website or go check it out on Amazon.com, Kalahari.net or Loot.co.za to buy the book or read reviews etc.

SA Blog Award 2008 time

2008-02-12T04:07:00.000-08:00

Think this blog deserves a nomination? Then vote by clicking here!

Melt in your mouth Valentine's gifts

2008-02-11T21:55:00.000-08:00

I don't usually go off-topic, but I stumbled upon The Chocolate Covered Company and thought I'd share my find (in lieu of Valentine's Day).

Imagine having edible valentines day gifts to share with your loved one. Chocolate covered peppers, jalapenos, berries...mmmm! The best part it seems, is that you can choose your chocolate poison - dark or white...

Even better news is that you can have your chocolate delicacies delivered by FedEx - to yourself or that special someone!

How many Rolos?

2008-01-30T00:50:00.000-08:00

I confess, I didn't count them. I ate them - quickly.
I can tell you that there is an uneven number of Rolos in the packet!

Is the uneven number of Rolos an attempt by Nestle to make the "Last Rolo" moment occur more often?

Well, I have now seen the "Last Rolo" as a solid silver ornament and on a necklace. It is a romantic thought, but a Rolo around the neck? mmm... I can definitely vouch for the Rolo in the packet - it tastes good!

Would you share your last Rolo?

2008-01-28T02:23:00.001-08:00

Soon it will be Valentine's day and many people will flock to retail outlets to spoil their Valentine with a romantic (and expensive) gift. Some will spend the night wining and dining in restaurants that will exclusively be filled with couples.

But really, wouldn't you just rather have a "last Rolo moment"? Remember the advert with the animated characters where they share the Rolo? The one character says, "It's my last one, but you can have it." They also had another advert with a a guy and girl sitting in the cinema, the guy proceeds to give the girl the last Rolo, but then a babe sits down next to hima and he tries to get the Rolo out of the girl's mouth.

The Rolo advert have always stuck in my mind. It was such an endearing advert. One that almost made you go out and buy a packet. There is something about being able to share "the last Rolo", but what if you don't have anyone you can share it with? Do you just avoid the last Rolo and gobble it up quickly or save it for the day you actually may stumble upon someone you would like to share it with?

Read more about Rolo & Rolo moments & products:
http://www.nestle.co.uk/OurBrands/AboutOurBrands/ConfectioneryAndCakes/Chocolate+Sweets.htm
http://www.firebox.com/index.html?dir=firebox&action=product&pid=739
http://www.the-joke-shop.com/extras/extra5/rolo.asp

A life less ordinary?

2008-01-24T05:35:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder what my life would've been like if I had chosen to be a little more "ordinary/normal".

I guess I would've ended up being married by 22, with 2 kids by the age of 25, no career and being a housewife. There is definitely nothing wrong with wanting to be the mom/the wife/the caretaker, but is that always enough? Do people that got married young sometimes feel that they have missed out on something/life?

I can't even imagine having to change my chaotic lifestyle to accommodate someone special, because lets face it, I'm not the easiest person in the world to get along with or to adjust to. I'm just too much of an Aries.

In 10 years I have probably had more relationships that failed than what I care to remember. Finally, now, I am tired of dating.

The one thing that I've learnt in the last few years is that, boyfriends come and go, but my cat is always there. So, when I get home, I will have a tequila to that.

A Public Affair - Facebook Dating Status

2008-01-13T23:40:00.000-08:00

Going through a breakup is hard, no matter the circumstances, but when it is a public Facebook affair - it becomes a little harder.

The whole changing of the "Facebook Dating Status" was more than just a little traumatic for me. It made the breakup public before I was ready to face it. I fear the worst when things like this are out of my control. I don't want pity emails landing up in my inbox. I'm ok, or will be ok, I'm not quite sure yet.

I guess I'll take time off from dating for now - untill after my holiday in Europe. I think I just need to clear my head and get back to clubbing and hanging out with my friends - for now.

2007 and Dating

2007-12-20T02:25:00.000-08:00

For all those lonely hearts out there, 2008 may just be the year that you find the love of your life - so, never give up.

I know that the holiday period comes with some sadness and loneliness too - but, you know what, life is too short to sit around and mope, so get busy and do something (anything).

Yes, I've finished writing my "How To Become A (Real) Serial Dater" book and now it is with a literary agent - so keep your fingers crossed! I will however never stop writing this blog, never fear!

Wishing you all a merry Christmas and a prosperous 2008!

Neighbourly Discussions about Online Dating

2007-11-20T03:20:00.001-08:00

Last night I had an interesting conversation with my next door neighbour. Both of us have tried the online dating thing but have never quite been all that lucky in love for all the money we spent on subscriptions.

This is what my neighbour had to say:

Online dating allows you to move too easily between partners - it is like a 24 hour menu that constantly changes. Whenever you get tired of one dish all you have to do is move on to the next one on the menu...

Online dating teaches people to actually be promiscuous (in a sense)...

He also told me about an email on "how to write your online dating profile" was sent by one of the sites that encouraged people to write profiles that would make them look better on paper (ie. better than they are in person).

Why I agree:

It is true that in the months that I had spent online and went on dates I always went back to look for someone better than the person that I've just been on a date with. I had so much choice that if something was wrong with a person - no matter how small - I would just move on.

What is your view on online dating?

What does compatibility have to do with love and relationships?

2007-11-20T03:05:00.001-08:00

How difficult is it to date someone that is the complete opposite of you? Will it work in the long run? Won't you just get fed up with having to have to deal with a short tempered or completely chilled person?

Will your relationship last? Will you have the patience and will to make your relationship succeed? (- or will you give up and move on?)

Obviously I'm writing a post on this as I have noticed that my boyfriend is the complete opposite of me. I have a short temper and don't really have any patience (as patience is not a virtue, but rather for people with too much time on their hands), nor do I function all that well when things don't go as planned - but on the other hand I can think on my feet and get things done when I need to.

Now the obvious next question is - how do laid back people cope with dating the aries type?

BTW - this is post 101 :)